Differential Value


My name it is Damian Hinds

And I am of limited value

My brains are inside my behind

Still, you shan’t share this factoid, now shall you?


Science is wonderfully smart

And vital to life as we know it

There isn’t a premium in art

And of course there’s no cash in a poet


Let’s hike up the cost of a study

Which aims towards science and tech –

The price of all arts courses, buddy

Will be cheap as a kopek or lek


Chemists! How richly delightful!

The top-notch, despite being broke

Artists! How jolly but frightful

With their efforts as wispy as smoke


I’m a political fellow

With no wit in my tucker or bib

I’m as useless as mould on old Jell-O

But here is the cut of my jib –


The sheep doesn’t need so much glory

As society’s hard-headed goat

But I am a dunderhead Tory

With the wit of a ferret or stoat



Click here for a transcript



22 February 2018

"What we need to look at is the different aspects of pricing [of university courses] - the cost that it is to put on the course, the value that it is to the student and also the value to our society as a whole and to our economy for the future.” Damian Hinds, Education Secretary, on The Andrew Marr Show (BBC1)


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