Two Poems On British Politics
Two Poems On British Politics
The Phoenix lander prods away
Beneath the toxic shale;
The bombshell has his deep blond day
And Elvis starts to wail –
Rich in iron oxide dust,
His quiff stands proud and true;
The moral compass lies there, bust,
Indescribably Blue.
The planet once revered as red
Wears polar caps, off-white.
The liar takes his tongue to bed:
We’re lonesome every night.
The hound dog and the teddy bear
Have suffered geo-death –
The blatherers have gas to spare,
But Elvis draws his breath –
The solar system shudders when
It hears the new agenda:
On Mars a parcel’s marked in pen –
Oh please, Return To Sender.
Popping pills and bright green cheese,
The King is cold as ice:
Down here, there is an arid breeze,
And no-one treats us nice.
***
I am an olive, pale and green,
But puffed up by blue filling:
I taste, my friends, a tad obscene –
I’m here to make a killing –
I am a bitter canapé,
But wait until the feast –
A pinch of salt sets me away.
Your palm will be well-greased
Once you have opened this, my tin:
Hey Crespo! Don’t recoil –
You’ll also find, when I begin,
That I'll be oozing oil.
