Are you or have you ever been
Dear Sir, Please send me, in a jiffy
Evidence that you are Blue,
Your politics distinctly iffy,
Your choice of pals a motley crew –
If you are breathing Tory gas,
If you are paying Tory dues,
We’d like to out you as an ass.
Of course you’re free to hold your views.
Dear Madam, Rush me in a hurry,
Evidence that you are Right,
That you live in a moral slurry
Where feelings suffer from a blight –
If you have eaten Tory cake,
If you have lit the Tory fuse,
We’d like to give your throat a shake.
Of course you’re free to hold your views.
Dear All, Please let me know, in haste,
If you think Europe’s up a gumtree,
And that you view this with distaste,
And that you’d like to save our country:
If you think we should take control,
And say it loud in pubs and pews,
We’d like to fight you, on the whole.
Of course you’re free to hold your views.
Click here for a Guardian story
