Siberia
The London council Croydon,
Although not very flash,
Is acting like a hoyden
Because it’s strapped for cash.
For those who have no shelter
It’s come up double-plus –
Its plan’s a proper belter:
Stick HULL upon a bus
And send them to the north
In any sort of number:
Homeless multiply? Go forth
To live beside the Humber.
There’s plenty who can park in
The jewel on Yorkshire’s coast,
The hiding-place of Larkin
(And presumably his ghost);
It is the very best spot
That Croydon could have found:
It also has John Prescott,
Who’ll quickly show them round;
And those in Surrey’s out-tray
May find Hull to their taste
(‘As far as Hull’, the papers say –
There’s far more frozen waste).
It’s Stalin-style migration
To the Holy Trinity steeple:
It suits the Southern nation
That Hull is other people.
Click here for an article in The Guardian
Click here to buy Bill’s new poetry collection, Ringers
