Better Than Bleach
I used to be prime minister
I used to run the nation's views
From Fair Isle down to Finisterre
Read riot act and shipping news
I had it all inside my head
I was The Man, The Mouth, The Met
My heart is pink, my hands are red
But no, I suffer no regret
I was the prefect in the class
I handed out the sticks of chalk
But, coated now in liquid glass
I have no further need to talk
Don't ask me what there might have been
Don't ask me if I owe a debt
But do admire my wipe-clean sheen
And no, I suffer no regret
This fabulous resistant spray
Is stuck to my exterior
It varnishes my sins away
It kills all known bacteria
And having had this sterile rinse
Protected from all fungal threat
No need to ask me questions, since
I really suffer no regret
I always used my words to soothe
I knew that truth was malleable
But now I am quadruply smooth
And now I am infallible
It's like a coat of perfect drool
And thinner than a dirty sweat
So thanks of course to Nanopool
I never suffer from regret
Do not question, never ask
What happened in the years before
Invisible behind this mask
I only know I went to war
And people died and paid the cost
For which there is no epithet
Secure behind this permafrost
I cannot suffer from regret
