'Tis the season to be careful
Don't kiss under the mistletoe
Unless you're wearing masks
Unless you're wearing masks,
Unless you're wearing masks
Debrett says
Don't kiss under the mistletoe
Even if someone asks
Or you may catch swine flu
Don't share sherry with Santa Claus,
You don't know where he's been,
Don't know where he's been,
Don't know where he's been
Debrett says
And don't kiss Rudolf's red nose, uh-oh,
See just what I mean
I bet he's got swine flu
I'd be wary of the sparkling fairies
Who sit upon the trees
They've read Debrett on etiquette
And they're chary of a sneeze
So don't climb up to see their stars
Whatever else you do
I bet they've got swine flu
Don't play Twister at Christmas-time,
You're bound to break an arm
Bound to break an arm,
Bound to break an arm
Debrett says
Even with your sister, don't play Twister,
You're bound to come to harm
And also catch swine flu
Eat your turkey by yourself,
And keep your wishbone dry
Keep your wishbone dry,
Keep your wishbone dry
Debrett says
Don't go near the parson's nose,
And say that you are shy
Say goodbye, swine flu
Don't cut cake, it's a big mistake
Someone'll touch your crumbs
Don't share your champers and seasonal hampers
Even with your chums
Sing a carol in surgical apparel,
And keep your mouth shut too
Or you may catch swine flu
Wandering hands, you'll understand,
Are this year firmly banned
This year firmly banned,
this year firmly banned
Debrett says
Don't go 'mwah' - not even if
You're blotto, stinko, canned
You're bound to catch swine flu
All together now:
Don't kiss under the mistletoe
Uunless you're wearing masks
Unless you're wearing masks,
Unless you're wearing masks
Debrett says
Don't kiss under the mistletoe
Even if someone asks
Or you may catch swine flu
