In Syria, there are three laws
Nigerian rebels add applause
The Scots stand by the exit doors
But Kate is preggers, to our chuff
Beggars lie in Kurdish roads
Boko Haram implodes, explodes
Brown’s exhumed as Salmond goads
But Will and Kate are up the duff
Medievals fill the web
In Lagos, watch the power ebb
The saltire lass may be a deb
But watch the Windsor babe uncurl
A caliph thrives on discontent
Borno has no government
The Scots are poised to pitch their tent
But Charles is hopeful it’s a girl
What’s the beef, what’s not to like?
The world has nowt to shout about
More babies for the English reich!
Fly bunting, get the trestles out!