Manifesto

Now I know working people

I like to hob their nob

They’re all Tory voters

When they’re on the job

With their jobs they’re all for me

A Tory voter you would be

If you could see what I see daily

With my little ukulele

In my hands er er er

 

Now here’s a manifesto

It’s very very swish

When it’s cooked with pesto

It’s an interesting dish

Oh Mr Ed Oh Mr Ed

I’ve got that sinking Chinese

Laundry feeling

With my little ukulele

On my knee er er

 

I will raise your threshold

It will never hurt

Look at this my banjo

It’s underneath my shirt

Now my old man’s a dustman

He is a has-bin type

I have a little little little

Banjo string to pluck

When I have my ukulele er er er

 

They’re playing in Tahiti

You should have seen them smile

Their man was pleased to see us

It was sticking out a mile

Now if you want the good life

I said now don’t you fret

And my little ukulele

Will be leaning on the lamppost

At the corner of the street er er

 

It’s a job that just suits you

Zero hours nowt to do

Austerity that’s very true

If your name is Cinders

With my little stick of rot

You can really hit the spot

By voting for me gaily

With my little ukelele

Turned out bora bora er er er

 

Click here for a BBC story

 

Click here for another BBC story

 

Click here to buy a copy of Bill’s poetry collection Ringers

 

Click here for Bill’s New Statesman research project

 

 

 

 

14 April 2015

David Cameron launched the Tory manifesto for ‘working people’ and ‘a good life’. A protestor with a ukulele strummed that he should go back to Eton. On Tahiti, 4750 ukulele players set a new world record; they were playing ‘Bora Bora I’.

 

(with apologies to George Formby)


POETRY KIT WEBRING

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